Parent Effectiveness Training gives advice which boils down to:

  • Listen, truly listen to what the child is saying
  • Treat children as equals, just as if they are your age/your friends, in the end they develop very nuanced emotional intelligence as early as half year olds
  • Stop and listen to youself, whatever your good intentions, how might the child interpret what you are saying
  • Be authentic and share your thoughts, ideas, worries and problems. You are a parent, a human being, not a perfect god
  • Engage!
  • Problem ownership: who owns the problem should deal with it, the other can only help by listening
  • If there is a values conflict, express your needs then ask for potential solutions, give the child a chance to care and consider