5: The First Test
takes 48 hours for a dog to suss out its environment. Then it takes about two weeks for it to sort out its place in its new home. It’s like anybody starting a new job, it takes you about a day or two to sort out your desk then another two weeks to find your place in the company. So for the first two weeks I continued in this vein, effectively leaving him to his own devices. Whenever I did speak to him I did so as kindly as possible. Every now and again I would look across the room at him and just say: ‘Hello, love.’ I would see his little tail wagging, almost against his will as if he couldn’t help it. It was as if he wanted to know what was required of him, but again I let him be.
I knew this was an opportunity to establish some sort of pattern so I decided I wasn’t going to chase after him. I wanted him to play the game by our rules so I carried on playing with Sasha. Sure enough, a few minutes later he reappeared. He came up with the ring again, I threw it again and he went to retrieve it again. This time, however, he came back and brought it back to me. I rewarded him with a ‘good boy’ and repeated the exercise. He did the same thing again. Every dog, like every human, learns at its own pace. In this case we were talking about a remedial animal, a damaged dog, so I knew it was going to be a slow process.
When I did more research I discovered that this is the most vulnerable area in most species, including humans. How many humans do you allow to touch your head and neck? Only those you trust. When dogs fight, the violence will begin when one arches over the neck of the other one. It was at this moment that I remembered something that Monty Roberts had said. He explained that if the animal believes in you, you can touch its most vulnerable area. It is, in some ways, the ultimate expression of your leadership. You are telling your subordinate that you know how to destroy it. The fact that you do not only underlines your authority even more.
6: Amichien Bonding: Establishing Leadership of the Pack
Even I have had to accept that one thing is beyond them, however. Dogs are never going to learn our language. The bad news is that to communicate successfully with our dogs, it is up to us to learn their language. It is a task that requires an open mind and a respect for the dog. No one who regards a dog as their inferior will achieve anything. It must be respected at all times for what it is.
The Alpha pair control and direct life within the pack and the remainder of the pack accept that rule unfailingly. Each subordinate member is content to know its place and its function within this pecking order. Each lives happy in the knowledge that it has a vital role to play in the overall well-being of the pack.
It is the Alpha pair’s job to provide this leadership. It is the job of the subordinates to follow and provide support. When the kill has been made, the Alpha pair get absolute precedence when it comes to eating the carrion. The pack’s survival depends on their remaining in peak physical condition after all. Only when they are satisfied and signal their feed is over will the rest of the pack be permitted to eat – and then according to the strict pecking order, with the senior subordinates feasting first and the juniors last. Back at the camp, the pups and babysitters will be fed by the hunters’ regurgitation of their food. The order is absolute and unbreakable. A wolf will act aggressively towards any animal that attempts to eat before it. Even the fact that the pack contains its blood relatives will not stop the Alpha attacking any animal that breaks with protocol and dares to jump the queue.
flight, freeze or fight – and will run away, ignore the threat or defend themselves. Whichever response the Alpha pair select, the pack will again back up their leaders to the hilt. The fourth key ritual is performed whenever a pack is reunited after being apart. As the pack reassembles, the Alpha pair remove any confusion by reasserting their dominance via clear signals to the rest of the pack. The pair have their own personal space, a comfort zone if you like, within which they operate. No other wolf is allowed to encroach into this space unless invited to do so. By rejecting or accepting the attention of other members who wish to enter their space, the Alpha pair re-establish their primacy in the pack – without ever resorting to cruelty or violence.
This is why dogs should never be given the responsibility of being Alpha of a pack, as they will simply be unable to cope with the decisions they face. The responsibility puts immense pressure on them and leads to the behavioural problems I so often witness.
The bonding takes the form of four separate elements. Each correlates to the specific times I have identified when the pack’s hierarchy is established and underlined. On each occasion, the dog is confronted with a question which we must answer on its behalf. when the pack reunites after a separation, who is the boss now? when the pack is under attack or there is a fear of danger, who is going to protect them? when the pack goes on a hunt, who is going to lead them? when the pack eats food, what order do they eat in?
The dog must, in effect, be blitzed with signals. It needs to learn that it is not its responsibility to look after its owner, that it is not its job to care for the house, that all it has to do is sit back and lead a comfortable and enjoyable life. It is a mantra that must be repeated over and over again.
So whether they are away for eight hours or eight seconds, the moment the charge reappears the dog will go through a ritual aimed at re-establishing its leadership. To redress this, the owner must begin displaying the behaviour of a leader. And the first step to establishing that leadership is learning to ignore the dog.
The dog will signal that its resistance is over by relaxing or walking off somewhere and lying down. It is the first indication owners get that the dog is seeing them and their relationship in a new light. The dog’s deferral reflects a new respect for the owner’s space. The process is far from over,
The key points I ask people to remember as they move on is that they should always make eye contact and should always call the dog by its name. Most important of all, they should always remember to reward its good behaviour when it does come as requested.
. If the dog starts to slip back into its old ways like this, the owner must at this point stop immediately and leave the process for at least an hour before starting again. The dog must understand that there are consequences to its actions and just as good behaviour is rewarded with food or affection, undesirable behaviour produces a less enjoyable consequence; it loses what it craves most, its leader’s attention.
An additional tool in this stage is the creation of ‘no-go areas’ within the home. Early on, a dog can be taught that certain areas of the house belong to the leader. Again, the dog will recognise the principles at work from its instinctive connection to the wolf. Within the pack, the Alpha’s space is respected at all times. Subordinates enter this space only at their leader’s invitation.
This most commonly manifests itself at home when visitors arrive. We have all witnessed dogs going berserk at the sound of a doorbell or knocker. There is not a postman or milkman alive who has not been at the receiving end of this sort of unwanted attention. Again, the key to understanding this behaviour lies in the pack. If a dog believes it is the leader of its pack, it believes it is its role to defend the pack’s den. So in instances like this, the dog is responding to an unidentified threat. Someone or something is about to enter its community and it is anxious to know precisely who or what it is. It believes it is then its responsibility to deal with the intruder.
When the dog begins barking or jumping up at the sound of someone at the door, the job of the owner is to thank the dog. The point here is that the owner, as the leader, is acknowledging the vital part the dog is playing in the pack. The dog has realised there is potential danger and has alerted the decision maker.
Relieved of responsibility, the dog can get on with leaving the decision maker to decide whether this visitor will be allowed through the door. All dogs are clearly different. Some will have developed worse habits than others so there will inevitably be different reactions – from both the dogs and the humans. Experience has taught me that there are four ways of approaching this situation. Firstly, owners can permit the dog to come to the door with them. If this is the case, however, the guest must be asked to completely disregard the dog in the same way that the owner has been doing after separations. It must be explained to them that whatever their instinct, they must not fuss over the dog.
So the first alternative to this is to offer the owner the option of putting the dog on a lead. This will allow him or her greater control if the situation becomes difficult. If the dog’s behaviour is truly unacceptable, the next alternative should be applied and the dog should be asked to go into another room. It is vital that this is not seen as an act of exclusion or punishment, however. The dog must not be physically shoved or lifted out of the way. It should not be thrown out of the house, into the garden for instance.
The dog should be praised for recognising the danger, then removed from the decision-making process and given a favourite tidbit for co-operating.
As they move on, the first thing I recommend owners do is teach the dog to sit. It is, for most ordinary dog owners, the most important means of getting a dog to exercise its right to freeze. It is a useful – and at times vital – control to have available. In certain dangerous situations, it can save a dog’s life.
. To teach a dog to sit, I ask the owner to first call their dog to them, then to bring a morsel of food up to the dog, almost touching its nose, then draw the morsel over the dog’s head. As the dog instinctively arches its head back to follow the smell, so its body will tip back naturally as well. As this happens, the dog’s bottom should touch the ground. As it does so, the tidbit should be popped in the dog’s mouth,
. If this is repeated, the dog will quickly learn the realities of life: if it does the job right it will get its wages, if it does it wrong it won’t.
confined to the key area of the head, the neck and the shoulders. The signal is unequivocal: I am the leader, I know your weakness but I am here to protect you. The dog will have no option but to trust anyone who presents such formidable credentials.
going on a walk, which is equivalent, in a dog’s eyes, to leading the pack on a hunt.
By far the easiest way for the owner to know if the walk is going according to plan, is to ask themselves if they are happy and in control. Once more, calmness and consistency are crucial.
pack. I ask owners to call their dog to them then, using a food reward, place the lead over the head. This is without doubt one of the most intense moments of the method: it marks the first occasion when the dog has been denied the option to flee. It is also the first time the owner has placed an object around the immensely important head, neck and shoulder area of the animal. If the dog shows any anxiety about this, make the association with the lead a positive one by using a food reward. Once it has accepted the lead, the dog’s belief in the owner’s leadership will deepen yet further.
This principle is never more important than at the next crucial stage: as the owner goes out of the front door. To the dog, this is a portal into another world, an exit from the den and a home to a million potential threats. It is absolutely vital that the owner goes through the door first. This signifies that he or she is the leader and that he or she is performing the job of making sure the coast is clear. Again this is an immensely powerful signal. If the dog somehow forces itself out first, then it is back to the beginning again.
. As the walk begins, for instance, the dog must never be allowed to walk ahead. Once more that position is reserved for the leader. If the dog senses this position is acceptable, its belief that it is leading the hunt will be established. Instead, the dog should remain at the owner’s side throughout.
. If a dog pulls continuously, the lead must be relaxed, signalling the walk is not going to take place. To many, this may seem hard, but it will not last for long. When dogs learn that by pulling on the lead the walk doesn’t happen, it doesn’t take long for the penny to drop.
Ultimately it is up to each owner to decide when and whether to allow the dog off the lead or not. It should not be attempted if there is the slightest worry that it may not come back. I advise anyone who is unsure of this to test the dog’s response to a request to come, inside the home or in the garden.
The technique is simple. Before preparing the dog’s food, I ask owners to place a small snack – one per person in the home – on a plate on a raised working surface. Anything will do, a biscuit, a cracker or a piece of toast. I then ask them to place the dog’s bowl next to the plate. Making sure the dog is paying attention, they should then proceed to mix its meal. Once this is done, without speaking to or looking at the dog, each member of the family should reach for their snack
eat it. Only when everyone has finished eating their biscuit or cracker should the dog’s bowl be placed on the floor. This should be done again with as little ceremony as possible, and only minor recognition of the dog. Then the owner should walk away and leave the dog to eat in peace.
There is no place for fear or pain in my method so my message is always the same: be patient, be gentle, and it will happen.
1: The Lost Language
There is compelling evidence to suggest our forefathers valued their dogs above almost everything else in their life. One of the most moving things I have seen in recent years was a documentary on the discoveries made at the ancient Natufian site of Ein Mallah in northern Israel. There, in this parched and lifeless landscape, the 12,000-year-old bones of a young dog were found resting beneath the left hand of a human skeleton of the same age. The two had been buried together. The clear impression is that the man had wanted his dog to share his last resting place with him.
In simple terms, both were predators and lived in groups or packs with a clear structure. One of the strongest similarities the two shared was their inherent selfishness. A dog’s response to any situation – like man’s – is ‘what’s in it for me?’ In this instance, it is easy to see that the relationship they developed was of immense mutual benefit to both species.
The two species understood each other instinctively and completely. In their separate packs, both man and wolf knew their survival depended on the survival of their community. Everyone within that community had a role to perform and got on with it.
In more recent times our relationship has changed, as far as I am concerned, often to the detriment of the dog. Our former partners in survival have become companions cum accessories.
Today, man’s concept of the dog’s role and the dog’s idea of its place are completely at odds with each other. We expect this one species to abide by our norms of behaviour, to live by rules we would never impose on another animal, say a sheep or a cow. Even cats are allowed to scratch themselves. Only dogs are told they cannot do what they like.
3: Listening and Learning
Why else would I be given such specific treatment when I came in through the door or when greeting visitors? Why else would she get so hyperactive about my leading her out on a walk? I realise now that so many of my mistakes were down to human conditioning. Like almost every other person on this planet, I had assumed that the world revolved around our particular species, and that every other species had somehow fitted into our grand scheme. I had assumed that because I owned the dogs, then I had to be their leader too. Now, for the first time, I began to wonder if that really was the case. I began to wonder whether Sasha was trying to take care of me.
What if I am imposing a rather arrogant, presumptuous – and typically human – framework on this? What if, instead, I imagine it from a dog’s point of view and rather than thinking it is dependent on us, the dog thinks the exact opposite, that it is responsible for us? What if it believes it is the leader of a pack in which we too are subordinates? What if it believes it is its job to safeguard our welfare rather than the other way around?’ As I thought about it, so much suddenly locked into place. I thought of separation anxiety. Instead of looking at a dog that was worrying ‘Where’s my mum or dad?’ we had a dog worrying ‘Where’s my damned kids?’ If you had a two-year-old and realised you didn’t know where it was, wouldn’t you be going insane with worry? Dogs were not destroying the house through boredom: it was through sheer panic. When your dog jumps up at you when you come in, it is not because it wants to play with you, it is because it is welcoming you back to the pack that it believes it is in charge of.
4: Taking the Lead
Before I started, I knew two elements were of paramount importance. I was soon calling them ‘the two Cs’. I had to be consistent and I also had to be calm. For generations we have been taught to instil obedience in our dogs by barking orders at them. Words like ‘sit, stay, beg, come’, we have all used them. I use them myself. Dogs do recognise them, but not because they understand the meaning of the words. They merely learn to make associations with the sounds if they are used repeatedly. As far as I am concerned, their effectiveness proves only the value of being consistent in providing information to your dog.
In both the human and the dog world, the greatest form of leadership is the silent, inspirational type.
Planning it all in my mind the night before I began, I had decided to imitate the behaviour of the Alpha by ignoring them. This was not, of course, the easiest thing in the world to do. But I soon realised that I had more tools available than I had
Behaviourism had taught me that you should ignore undesirable and excessive behaviour but be sure to praise the positive, so I underlined this by making a quiet, extra fuss of them when they did come to me.
This time I decided to tell people to ignore the dogs when they came through the door. Those dogs that kept bounding up, I took into another room. Of course some people thought I was crazy. To them, it was the most natural thing in the world to acknowledge a dog, particularly if it’s a beautiful dog. My friends and family had certainly been in the habit of making a fuss of Sasha, Khan, Sandy and Kim. But I was determined to give this a chance and insisted they do as I
I saw how the Alpha pair allowed the subordinates to run around for a while but that eventually all calmed down and they was able to lead the hunt in an orderly fashion. So the first time I gathered the dogs together for a walk, I did not try to stop them getting excited: quite the opposite. Again thinking about the principles of the wolf pack, I realised dogs have got to get wound up because, to them, this is the prelude to a hunt and they have to get their adrenaline pumping. What I was trying to do was not fight their instinct but go with it.
Previously, like so many other dog owners, I would be taken for a drag down the road by the dogs, an experience I never particularly enjoyed. However, I found that if, whenever the obligatory pulling started, I waited, the results were remarkable. The dogs quickly realised they were getting nowhere fast, and one by one their leads all slackened as they gave up trying and turned round to look at me.
I realise now that I was being human, I was overcomplicating things. I kept thinking: ‘There has to be more to it than this, it can’t be this simple,’ and kept looking for other things. Slowly, however, it was dawning on me that in some ways it really was this simple.
The importance of eating in front of a dog was something I had read while studying the behaviourists. They recognised it as a simple way of showing them you are the leader.