https://bigthink.com/the-well/how-hustle-culture-kills-happiness/
What if our incessant drive for self-improvement isn’t always conducive to happiness? Cognitive scientist Laurie Santos proposes that while evolution has wired us for relentless self-enhancement, our modern environment, ripe with comparisons and demands for excellence, amplifies this instinct — often to our detriment.
The incessant push for “more” and “better” can lead to societal harm, fostering a competitive, individualistic society rather than one rooted in collective harmony and goodwill (Outliers - extended families, better health outcomes). Moreover, it can compromise personal happiness. Genuine well-being, Santos suggests, arises from extending compassion towards others and ourselves.
Self-compassion, defined as mindfulness, recognition of common humanity, and self-kindness, can surprisingly enhance performance and resilience without a drill-sergeant approach. Breaking free from the pervasive “hustle culture” requires acknowledging its illusory nature, prioritizing kindness towards oneself, orienting towards others, and practicing gratitude to appreciate one’s journey.
Transcript highlights
We are a species that constantly wants to improve ourselves. Natural selection didn’t want us to achieve some level and just stop and chill out and smell the roses. We want to perfect ourselves and our natural instincts to do more, more, more might be being exacerbated by the modern environment: even when we’re objectively doing great; there can be this constant push to do more, more, more.
Being in this kind of meritocracy where we could all be the best of the best if we keep competing with one another and fighting ourselves, that doesn’t lead to a great society. It leads to a very individualist society where we’re all selfishly looking out for ourselves. It doesn’t lead for the kind of collective harmony and the kind of collective goodwill that we want as a society.
The evidence suggests that our well-being seems to come from being other-oriented, from extending compassion to other people and to ourselves.
Neff defines ‘self-compassion’ as engaging in three different parts:
- mindfulness. You’re noticing what this kind of constant striving is doing to you is doing to your well-being.
- ‘common humanity’ which is recognizing you’re only human: you’re not gonna be perfect all the time, you’re not gonna be great at everything.
- ‘self-kindness,’ which is treating yourself like a friend. And that doesn’t mean letting yourself off the hook having no ambition whatsoever, but it means having realistic ambition that you kind of push yourself, but you push yourself in a kind and often curious way.
Neff finds that the act of engaging in more self-compassion, perhaps ironically, causes us to perform better. We’re less likely to procrastinate because we’re not beating ourselves up all the time. It’s also a recipe for improving your resilience so that if something bad does come up you wind up being healthier over time. She even finds that it’s a way to reduce the kind of post-traumatic stress disorder that can come from really awful circumstances. In this sense doing less IS doing more.