Motivation
What does the experience of being able to put in 100% effort look like, where does it come from:
- Energy level
- Alignment of emotions with the task
Not “feeling like it” or not “having energy for it at the moment” is the opposite side.
Stress is strongly related to sense of identity. Latter regulates the former. How we perceive difficulty of something will determine the stress level, which will determine our motivation/energy level for it:
- Something is too easy, the stress is low and energy level is also low.
- Something is moderate in difficulty, stress is moderate, becomes eustress, energy level is high.
- Something is difficult, stress is high, the body starts thinking the task is too difficult to pay off and goes into energy saving mode.
Self-identity is malleable, otherwise we wouldn’t be able to change over time, this is how therapy works and what spiritual practices teach (The Power Of Now - enlightenment). Change identity to change how you view difficulty, this will result in an “infinite motivation hack”, so to say.
From “I don’t feel like it” to Identity Exercise
If you say you’re not “feeling like it” or not “having energy for it at the moment”
Ask:
- what about me makes this task difficult?
- what about this task makes it boring for me?
Trace it back to you, doesn’t matter how others would be able to do it, how others could handle the anxiety etc etc, it’s all about you.
While answering these questions: don’t worry about arguing with it, don’t convince yourself to be different. Just notice relations about you and the task.
Notice the thoughts, a la “I am not a good dancer” and then try to realize that it does not matter. It’s a thought (“I have not learned dancing”), that the ego made into identity (“I am not a good dancer”) which you can melt away because it was made up anyway. In the moment, let go of the identity and see what you can do in the moment (“I can try dancing out and I can learn dancing”), it does not matter how good or bad you are at something, you can only focus on action itself (“Do I want to do it or not”, not “will this turn out good or bad” or “will I look stupid or capable”).
Desire to switch tasks / follow-through
Following through with ideas, the brain may get bored or distracted and then starts to use willpower to combat switching.
Will power is limited and will be exhausted at some point.
So it’s not the thing itself that is exhausting or difficult, it’s the war with the mind, using willpower to overcome the mind itself.
Urge surfing uses two properties of the mind:
- The mind is curious and likes to engage in new things.
- The mind develops tolerance to all stimuli.
Over time, urges subside, so not giving in and surfing on the urge makes the mind bored of that urge allowing us to get back to what we were doing.
Urge surfing:
- Start doing something
- Notice how the brain develops tolerance to that activity and the boredom might kick in
- Notice the desire to switch to something else (the mind will try to convince you with many a different reasons)
- Do nothing
- Notice the brain getting bored of that desire to switch
NOTE: What the mind naturally jumps to when you don’t want to do something are the worst case scenarios in which you will “definitely” fail. The mind will also fight with any attempt to change it’s way of thinking (i.e. using urge surfing) and will try it’s best to maintain modus operandi and sabotaging your best attempts.
Discipline
Discipline comes internally not externally.
Not being ready for discipline means that we are not ready to pay the price for it. The pain of doing is greater than the value of results.
We need a good interal reason to be disciplined, to do something.
Society, friends or family telling that something is important is the opposite of discipline.
- Ask: do you wish that you wanted to change?
- Then: explore where that wish comes from and which concrete changes it might lead to.
- Write the list of all wishes all down
- Next to each item, write if the wish comes from you or from others
- Start a small step towards one of the wishes that comes from you
- Small changes will lead to cumulatively big changes